Headstones in the burial ground at Gob Buirgh (Borve Point)

Manage worry and depression

Ronald D. Walker

I didn’t manage worry and depression through the greater part of my life, until depression brought me to the brink when my wife died unexpectantly.
In my later childhood I found a wire bound tablet and an ballpoint pen. I began writing an accounting of fiction which would eventually evolve into Mutual Transitions: https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/501420

I began to manage worry and depression when I found writing to be even more relaxing than reading, which has been my escape since early childhood. My routine became taking a book which was usually a Encyclopedia Britannica into my room and close the door. It was my attempt to isolate myself from the chaos that was constant in the house. Being and going where the book and my imagination led. When the degree of chaos was beyond my tolerance, I escaped to the yard. None of my family members came outside and I was not disturbed. Imagination and invention blossomed in every part of the yard. I could go anywhere or be anything that my mind could imagine. I escaped, if only for a short time, which allowed me to manage worry and depression.

Writing those fantastic adventures did not enter my mind until the bonds of responsibility drew me to a point of despair. I realized the need I had to manage worry and depression. Using a pen and a bound tablet to write became my escape, if only for a short time. I built the extended story of a man rising from the near ruin of his life. Progress of building the story was measured and the construction was unhurried for I had no plan of what I would do with the writing. Life is what happens to us while we make other plans. The sale of an Arabian horse brought brighter days and my writing stylus became a word processor purchased from a pawn shop.

Years went by and I continued expanding the story when time allowed. During those days the labor of driving a truck was not conducive to relaxing, writing to manage worry and depression. Driving and sleeping took most of those days, until I sold everything that kept me shackled to what had been a happy home that was lost due to a tragic event. I wanted to set fire to the house and escape. In some states a person can be charged with arson for such an act. Ownership does not play a part in what we are free to do. I left what had been my home and never went back. A one bedroom apartment gave an excellent atmosphere for continuing Mutual Transitions. I sold cleaning products going door to door and built a route for orders, deliveries and further orders.

With Mutual Transitions finished I sent the manuscript to publishers and waited for the news of acceptance. Only letters of rejection came, if anything was done. Most ignored and did not waste time or investment. I adapted new ways to manage worry and depression when I called a literary agent who asked if the story contained sex. Appalled, I empathically answered that it did not. His expressing that a first time author will not be published without sex being a big part of the story line, was the end of our conversation.

His declaration brought new determination to manage worry and depression as a complete change from the wholesome aspects of Mutual Transitions. I immediately wrote part one of Lovers Lies and Lilies: https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/424666 and published both Mutual Transitions and Lovers Lies and Lilies on Amazon. Following with Lovers Lies and Lilies Part Two: https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/692848 and Lovers Lies and Lilies Emilee’s Story: https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/721405 and continued writing to have thirty books published on Smashwords.
Amazon had three million eBooks when I published the first two books. Over the years it has grown to have more than five million. A book published now will give your writing relevance, but it will have almost no success without your efforts.

I discovered a second eBook publisher Smashwords.com and published all of my books and those that followed, but Smashwords also has almost one million and does not offer physical books. The world we live in does little to help a person find a way to become known. The individuals personal actions must. Learning to navigate through the obstacles is the only answer I have found. Success may be small at the beginning of the journey, but time tested means can make the toil worthwhile. Continue the positive feeling that you will eventually meet your goals. Follow your dream and preserver.